syllabelle

If I ever needed a reminder of how far I have to go, I certainly got one yesterday evening. I decided that I was going to quit “playing around” on my new treadmill, and get serious. Meaning, I was going to quit doing these little 10 minute walks where I just break a sweat, and then step off, and cool down. So at 10:00, when the news came on, I stepped on the treadmill. I programmed it for “mountain”, and set off. The incline was only at 1.5, and the speed starts at 1.7 mph. I set it for 35 minutes, and then started walking.

At 5 minutes I started breathing hard. At 10 minutes I was sweating. At 15 minutes my legs were burning. I was determined not to quit, and at 20 minutes (and 2.7 mph) I caught my second wind, and was just cruising for about 5 minutes. At 25 minutes, the speed began to decrease, and I felt like I had hit my stride. At 30 minutes I realized I was almost at a mile, and as the speed began to decrease even more, I realized that that last little bit was just going to creep by. At 35 minutes, I had walked 1.15 miles, and was sweating like crazy! When I stepped off the treadmill, my legs were shaky, and my heart was racing.

The point of all that?

I’m sooo out of shape! I can do 100 crunches with no problem, but I can’t walk a mile in under 30 minutes. Actually, to be fair, the “mountain” starts out VERY slowly (1.7 mph), speeds up periodically, has a peak speed of 2.7 mph, and then slows back down to 1.7 at the end of the walk. I think tomorrow evening, I’ll try the walk at 2.7 for the entire walk, and see if that feels any better (and gets me any farther.)

I’ve got complete confidence in my ability to feed myself nutritious foods, and to stay under my calorie limit for the day, and to quit eating by my cutoff time, but my body disappoints me. I don’t (mentally) feel like I’m doing anything too extreme, but my body sure disagrees with my head! I’m sure that in six months or a year from now I’ll look back at this and laugh at myself for being whipped after one measly mile, but right now I feel like…a fat person! *sigh*

I’m just wondering if the walkers and runners on BuddySlim remember what it was like to struggle through a mile. I most definately am not losing my motivation or determination, but I’d love to hear some of those “I remember those days!” stories.

(And to think I THOUGHT I wanted to get the Turbo Jam series! That would probably make me keel over and die on the spot! haha!)

Happy Monday to everybody, hope you had a great weekend.

It feels good to make good choices. When my fiance eats a big, cheesy, yummy-smelling cheeseburger and I eat my chicken salad like a good girl, it gives me this smug sense of satisfaction to know that I made a good choice. Although I’d love to have him join me in this journey. So…

I gave him a challenge. He’s going to weigh in the morning (the 28th). Then he’s going to cut out ALL sodas and sweetened drinks for the next 10 days. On Monday, August 7, he’ll weigh again, and we’ll see how much weight he’s lost. I lost 6 pounds when I quit, and it’s what gave me the jump-start and made me feel great about losing weight.

I’m excited to see what his results are, and I feel confident that he’s going to impress himself. I think that if he could lose several pounds over a few days, that he will feel motivated to join me, and keep up his progress. (I’m a sneaky one, eh?)

Anyway, I’ve been adding a little bit of abdominal exercises in the late evenings, just before bed. My belly is soft and (I hate this word) flabby, but I do have some abdominal muscles under there. I can whip out 4 reps of 25 crunches with no problem. My obliques are a little weak, and can do 2 reps of 20 on each side before I start feeling as if death is imminent. (Yeah, I exaggerate a little.)

I still (STILL!!) haven’t gotten my elliptical, so I’ve been having to use the stepper. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I have equipment, but I get a little burned out using the same thing every day. And my new treadmill…it’s in the garage…unused. Shame! It likely won’t get used any time before Sunday, either. Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays are my busiest days.

Speaking of Saturday. I’m going this Saturday to the YMCA to see about joining. I love working out at home, but I think it would be really fun and highly motivating to do some classes with a group. We’re on a pretty tight budget right now, so I’m hoping that they have some decent rates. Maybe a family plan would save us some money in the long run.

Just one hour until it’s time to go home, and I’m so ready. For some reason this day has seemed exceptionally long. Tomorrow is Friday though…and Fridays FLY BY! This week is almost over! YAY!

On a personal note (I’m going to rant for a minute. And I’m going to hide it just in case he reads over my shoulder.) (Scroll over the text to read it.)

I’m on my period and my breasts feel 10 times their normal size. My cramps are horrible, and ibuprofen isn’t doing a damn thing for me. I’m cranky and bitchy and moody, and I don’t want my fiance to even TOUCH me…and he says I’m just trying to be a bitch. At this point I’d trade him in for an armless and legless man…as long as he had a HEART! Men have no compassion. Grrrr!

When I get off, I think I’m going to go home and take a nap for an hour. I think I deserve it.

Happy Thursday Ladies!

It’s that time of week again when I pick two new things that will help me reach my goals. I’m so happy to have reached my first mini-goal!!! I uploaded new pictures of myself, and the only difference I can really see is that I’m SO MUCH HAPPIER. I know that 20 pounds isn’t a HUGE number…but it’s proof (to myself) that I can set a goal and reach it. I did go ahead and set a new 20 pounds mini-goal but I’m also going to start something new.

I was doing a little bit of research online about weight loss, and how to set good goals for yourself. Of course it wouldn’t be wise to say “I vow to lose 50 pounds in 2 months!” but “I vow to lose 50 pounds!” is reasonable. I can’t remember now who it was here on BuddySlim that was talking about a 10% goal, and I thought that was a GREAT goal. I then saw someone online that does a weekly “1% Challenge.” Losing 1% of my weight a week is COMPLETELY reasonable!

So I’m going to try a 1% Challenge this week. I started yesterday, and I’ll know by next Tuesday if I’ve reached my goal. If that works out…I’m going to keep going with a weekly 1% Challenge.

I’m also going to start eating more vegetables. I say…three servings of vegetables a day. I’m doing ok with fruit…but I have a harder time with vegetables.rn

I was a little nervous about how to celebrate my birthday. Usually I’d have a big dinner, and a huge cake with Butter Cream icing, and lots of vanilla ice cream. I decided that it was a special occasion and I was going to splurge a little. I started off with a big salad with FF Ranch dressing, and a slice of fresh pineapple cut up into it (yum!) Then I ate a “palm-sized” piece of grilled steak, steamed broccoli with a tiny bit of cheese, steamed squash, and I had about 1/3 of a dinner roll (with honey butter spread *drools*). I finished the meal with a small piece of carrot cake and about 1 oz of soft-serve vanilla ice cream. Altogether the meal was about 800 calories. I didn’t even try to count fat/protein/carbs etc…because I knew it was a splurge, and I just wanted to keep the day within my calorie range.

I think I did well, considering. Next year maybe I’ll celebrate my birthday at an all-you-can-eat Seafood buffet, and I’ll slide my size-10 butt into a booth and splurge my little heart out. hehe

Have a great Tuesday everyone! 

The first really good thing is that I reached my first mini-goal over the weekend! YAY!!!! It felt SO GOOD to step on the scale and see that number…and know that there are 20 pounds gone from my body that will NEVER be back!

I technically started this journey on June 10th, so I’m at 44 days. I know I’m losing a little faster than I should, but the first 6 or 8 pounds was totally water weight. I used to have edema in my ankles SO BAD! I’ve got normal ankles now, and only occasionally do I have any edema at all. So…although I’ve lost 20 pounds, I don’t need a speech about “slow down, you’re going too fast”…because I’m really not.

The second really good thing is…TODAY IS MY BIRTHDAY! I’m 32 today. I used to think I’d never make it past 21. I was just such an unhappy little soul…but every year I just keep plucking on, and I’ve got my chin up and a smile on my face.

I did go this weekend and get a haircut, and I bought some new clothes. I had my fiance take pictures this morning, and I’ll try to get those posted tonight. I may still look the same to most people, but inside…I feel like a million bucks.

I’m setting a new 20-pound mini-goal…and then I think I’ll put my weight ticker on my signature. One of my birthday presents is going to help me get to my goal faster…my fiance got me a treadmill!!! It’s really nice. It’s a used one, but it’s got variable speeds and inclines, and so you can do the whole “Country stroll”, “Mountain Hike” thing. wOot! We haven’t set it up yet, so I haven’t gotten a chance to use it. It’s starting to look like I’ll be using it in the garage…with no a/c! (*sweat*)

I had an appointment with my new Dr. this morning. He put me on some meds to help lower my heart rate, and it’s supposed to help with some heart palpatations I’ve been having. He also put me on a birth control pill that will cause me to only have a period once every 3 months. (*happy dance!*) I’m going to cross my fingers that it doesn’t cause me to gain weight…but if it does I’ll just have to work THAT MUCH HARDER!

Anyway, I hope everyone had a great weekend. Happy Monday!

I don’t know how I missed it, but somehow or another I never saw the Handbook on the Home page. I downloaded it this morning, and I’ve been reading it. I started the first section, and the first group of questions had me thinking about my feelings about weight and weight loss in general. I am so grateful for BuddySlim because I don’t have a strong support system at home. As a matter of fact, sometimes I feel as if I am being sabotaged at home, and I just have to keep saying no and maintaining “unwavering and absolute dedication” to this lifestyle change.

I haven’t yet reached a point where anyone has said “Are you losing weight?”…but I know it’s coming. I’m just happy to be changing my body and my attitude about why and how to lose weight. I don’t need external validation to know that I’m doing something good. The weight that I’m losing is lowering my BMI bit by bit, and decreasing my chances for diabetes, and helping me lower my high blood pressure.

I tell everyone I know about BuddySlim, but I think people have to be in the right place before they decide to take a step like joining a website to help them lose weight. The first thought is “Why do I need a website to help me lose weight?”…but after you’ve been here a while the thought is “How did I lose weight before BuddySlim?”

New pictures coming soon. I don’t care if nobody else can see my loss…I know it’s gone, and I’ll be able to see the difference.

Have a great weekend everybody, stay cool and DRINK LOTS OF WATER!

-Stephanie

I’ve read a lot about food diaries, and how they can be helpful. I thought “What a pain in the butt!” …but I decided yesterday that being fat is a bigger pain in the butt than keeping track of what I eat.

So today I went and bought a “composition book” and in black permanent marker I wrote “food diary” on the front of it (so I wouldn’t change my mind, and turn it into a personal diary.) Then in the back I put some nutritional information from some of the fast food places I eat. I was able to find at least one meal at each place that I can eat without going over the number of calories I allow myself per day. I printed the Nutritional chart from some of the places, and hand wrote info for others. I mentioned before that we don’t eat at home very often, so I have to be creative.

I also bought some fresh fruit…apples. And I bought a couple of packages of those little “100 Calorie Snacks” for those times at lunch when I am feeling deprived, and the vending machine starts sounding good. (Like when my co-worker starts eating a Hershey’s chocolate bar and I can smell the chocolate from across the room.)

I feel like I’m arming myself for a battle against fat, and that I’m learning more and more about what my best weapons are.

Anyway, I’m a little concerned because my weight is suddenly dropping rapidly. The only thing I’m doing different is that I’ve actually stopped eating after 7:30 or 8:00. I’m already almost at a 20 pound loss, and I was at 15 pounds just yesterday! I probably shouldn’t complain, because I know there will be times later when I will PRAY for even a pound to drop, but it just bothers me a little. I want to do this the RIGHT way, so that I never ever EVER have to go through this again.

We’re going to a cookout tomorrow evening, and I’m debating whether or not to bring something to eat for myself. I have eaten with these friends before, and she’s a GREAT cook…and he knows how to use a grill…and I just don’t want to over eat. Actually, now that I think about it, I’ll eat an apple before I go, and drink a big glass of water. If I’m already feeling full, then I won’t be tempted to overeat.

It’s almost midnight, and time for me to sleep. Goodbye Thursday, HELLO Friday!

Wow! I got up this morning, took a shower, and stepped out for my morning weigh-in. I was flabbergasted. 15 pounds! I know it’s not just about a number, but that number feels good. Every pound is a victory, every 5 pounds feels like cause for celebration, and this feels like a huge milestone. I’m within 5 pounds of my first mini-goal!

I’ve been thinking about what I’ll do when I hit my mini-goal.

-First, I’m going to set a new mini-goal. That way I don’t forget that this lifestyle change doesn’t stop just because I dropped 20 pounds. A new goal will remind me that I’ve still got a lot of hard work ahead of me.

-Second, I’m going to reward myself. I’m thinking I’ll go to the bookstore and buy something juicy to read. I love books!

-Last, I’ll probably go buy myself a new outfit. My pants are starting to fit a little loose, and my butt looks like I’m wearing a diaper, so it’s time to “size-down” a bit. I’m not going to go buy a whole new wardrobe, but a few key pieces are necesseties.

Mmmmmmm…shopping!

We’re going this evening to pick fresh blackberries. A handful of fresh blackberries, with a little dab of cool-whip light…yummmy snack! We might try to pick up some sand plums, too. I LOVE fresh-picked fruit! (Fresh-fruit smoothies. Fresh-fruit slushes. Frozen fruit pieces. Fresh fruit in plain yogurt. Mmmm. I think I’m hungry.)

yAy for humpday!

Yesterday my fiance and I went out to dinner with a group of friends. They picked the place: a Barbecue joint. Everything looked and smelled so good. I swear, I could have just dived right into the pan with the BBQ sauce in it and went swimming, it smelled THAT good. I opted for smoked chicken breast (with about 1 teaspoon of BBQ sauce “because a little goes a long way”, green beans, and corn on the cob (no butter or salt.) I had a bite of my fiance’s baked beans because he said “they’re SOOOOoooOOoo good” and one bite of his fried apple pie because I just wanted it. I think that given where I was, I did really well. Plus, we ate dinner at 6:00, and I didn’t eat again after that.

I’m really working on trying to stop eating by 8:00. I do ok for the most part, but if I do get REALLY hungry I try to have a low-cal snack like a piece of fruit, or carrot sticks, or a handful of my favorite Kashi cereal.

I’ve probably mentioned this 500 times already, but I bought an elliptical through eBay, and I’m just waiting for it to be delivered to me. I thought I’d have it by now, but I guess I shouldn’t think so much. My fiance’s dad is going to bring it from Arlington, TX to me in Oklahoma City. He said yesterday that it’s VERY NICE, and that it belongs in a gym somewhere. He actually suggested that my fiance and I open a “fitness room” at a little shopping center near where we live. (Uh, no? Can we say “liability?”)

I almost wish we could do something like that though. Seriously, the city we live closest to has a population of about 15,000…and there’s not ONE gym! There are over 40 churches, and 15 daycares, but not a single gym. There is a Curves center, but that’s NOT my thing. So if I want to go work out, I’ve got to drive about 20 miles, and with gas at almost $3.00 a gallon, it’s just not feasable. (Home gym, here I come.)

Anyway, this is starting to sound like a rant and I need to be getting ready for lunch. I’m going home to have a tomoto-mozzarella salad with balsamic vinaigrette dressing and baked chicken. (Nothing like home-grown, fresh-picked tomatos this time of year. Mmm.) I’ve already drank 40 ounces of water today, and with the temperature still on the rise, I’m sure I’ll drink at least 40 more. *sweat*

Hope everyone is having a great week.

Last but not least my TWO-FER TUESDAY picks:

*I’m going to start taking weekly measurements and pictures. (I’ve got to start tracking my progress in a way that I can see results, even when the numbers aren’t dropping.)

*I’m going to attempt to start eating at home more. (This is a major undertaking, because we don’t eat at home very often at all. As a matter of fact, the last time we ate at home was almost two weeks ago! It’s hard to control portions and calories when it’s being prepared by other hands.)

Anyway, that’s it for this week.

-Stephanie

I know we all struggle with staying motivated during this journey. When the weight doesn’t come off as fast as you want it to, when your next mini-goal seems out of reach, when you swear you can’t eat another salad, that’s when we need some inspiration.

For some inspiration may take the form of a coveted pair of “skinny jeans” that are hanging in their closet. Just taking those jeans out and holding them up for a comparison is a kick in the behind to get going.

Others may use a “skinny picture”, or a 3-D model, or a picture of their favorite celebrity as inspiration.

Some of us use our blog as inspiration. Re-reading “before” entries reminds you where you were, and where you don’t want to be again.

Some others use visualization to stay motivated. Closing your eyes and picturing yourself at goal is a strong morale boost.

One of the best things about BuddySlim (and other sites of this nature) is that you can meet people that are going through the ups and downs while you are…and you can get motivation from each other. This isn’t really a new idea though, because I’m sure there were weight loss groups back when the WWW was nothing but BBSes.

Anyway, there was a point to this post…and I’m getting to it.

I’ve recently realized that I am MOST inspired by stories that include “Before and After” photographs. I love seeing the change. When people lose weight it completely changes them. Not only do they weigh less, but they stand a little taller, pull their shoulders back a little more, raise their chins in pride, and frankly, most of them just GLOW!

Don’t believe me? Go to Google and do an image search with the key words “Before and After”, or go to 3FC and look at some people at goal there.

I’m telling you…I WAN’T THAT! I want that self-confidence. I want to not only look good, I want to feel GREAT, and I want to feel good about myself. I want to be able to post my picture here next year and have a newbie see it and be inspired. I. WANT. THIS!

What ispires you?

Your goals, minus your doubts, equals your reality.

-Ralph Marston

This is to answer Carrie’s question in the comments from my last blog entry:

My joke about Atkins is because about 3 1/2 years ago I went on Atkins and lost about 35 pounds in a month! I was really happy with my weight loss, but I could never duplicate that, and ended up going on Phentermine (a prescription appetite supressant) to keep losing weight. I did lose a lot of weight, but I can’t say it was healthy or smart.

Anyway, my thoughts on Atkins. Ultimately Atkins works by taking away our biggest source of calories..in the form of carbs. If you’re only eating meat, eggs and cheese with a few leafy greens tossed in…you’re also restricting the amount of calories that you eat, and the weight will just DROP off…and you think it’s because “I’m only eating 30 carbs a day!” when in reality it’s “I’m only eating 800 calories a day!”

Does that make sense?

Anyway, I have similar feelings about SBeach, because in the end of it all it works because you’re REDUCING YOUR CALORIE INTAKE.

I’m almost 32 years old, and truthfully I just recently have I realized that reducing calorie intake while increasing your water intake and exercising several days a week is really the ONLY way any diet will work consistently.

Whether it be SBeach, Atkins, WeightWatchers, Jenny Craig, NutriSystem or ANY of the better-known diets…they work by decreasing your calories.

Now, let me make myself clear on one thing: I don’t really have any problem with ANY of those diets. Whatever one has to do to lose weight, as long as it is healthy, is good. Some people can’t tell themselves “I need to only eat 1800 calories today.” and then follow through with it. However, take that same person and tell them “At the end of the week you’re going to go to a meeting (WW), and step on a scale for EVERYONE to see how much you weigh.”…that’s some motivation there. When everyone else is dropping 1, 2, 3, even 5 pounds in a week…wouldn’t you want the same? I know I would!

There’s things about those diets that work VERY WELL! I can’t say anything bad about them. It’s just not what will do it for me. Not right now anyway. Maybe when I get down to the last 30 pounds and I’m at a plateau and not making a pound of progress…maybe then I’ll need a little group motivation, but right now I’m trying a little do-it-yourself.

I started here: http://www.caloriecontrol.org/calcalcs.html and then I’ve also been using the tools here: http://www.sparkpeople.com .

I don’t want to sound like I’m some know-it-all or that I’m preaching…because I’ve only lost TWELVE pounds, but what I can say is that I finally feel like I understand the reason why I am losing weight. I feel like I’ve got this figured out. …and I’m on a roll.